My fictional friend Jonny 10-vax is upset. The Scottish ultra-MAGA Republican supporter and his Democrat girlfriend @chelsearodham have a new roommate, a Russian dissident by the name of Dimitri Stanislavski whom they met at a West Hollywood solidarity rally for Canadian truckers “unvaccinated and unemployed”. Although all three of them may be fictional, as a wise person said of some Hasidic stories, “just because it didn’t happen doesn’t mean it isn’t true” . This is different from the Hunter Biden laptop scandal, which is not fictional, happened and was true.
This week, Jonny is watching BBC News and celebrating with his fellow Britons since Queen Elizabeth II celebrates 70 years on the throne. She became a monarch at the age of 25 and part of her role as head of state is to have a weekly meeting with the current British Prime Minister. You never forget your first, and its first PM was Winston Churchill.
She became a monarch at the age of 25 and part of her role as head of state is to have a weekly meeting with the current British Prime Minister.
“We all need a king or a queen.” Jonny told Chelsea. “It made sense that you would get rid of King George III, Queen Elizabeth’s great-great-great-grandfather, since America wanted self-rule. But that all changed.
He sent her the YouTube link to President Biden’s recent rally when he identified the problems caused by his predecessor,”The Great King MAGA.” This bashing avoided referring to Trump as president, but upgraded The Donald to King Donald. Within hours, Trump shared a meme featuring his face on the ‘Lord of the Rings’ poster, proclaiming ‘The Return of the High King MAGA’. The mid-terms are coming.
Given that by nature Donald Trump is a lowly, self-deprecating man who doesn’t really like being in the spotlight, it’s not as if the new throne, Mr. Trump, will relentlessly use him to his advantage. and squeeze every PR gem. out of the shining crown.
“It’s so exciting that in 2024 the real king is back in power,” he continued via text message. Chelsea ignored him and hit back with an anti-monarchy text message. “What is your royal family for, anyway? “The Queen provides stable continuity as governments come and go,” he replied. “She’s always there, someone who will be there through good times and bad, like your friendly grandmother.”
“Yes,” said Chelsea. “Like your friendly grandmother who is worth £6billion based on your forced taxes and uses some of that money to house her Jeffrey-Epstein friend son Prince Andrew who just paid £10million in a lawsuit against someone who was abused on Epstein’s Island. “You are so cynical,” Jonny retorted. “The Royal Family is great for the country, it symbolizes something bigger and it’s great for tourism revenue.” “Why not just hire a better PR agency for the UK Tourist Board and do more digital advertising to stimulate overseas visitors?” said Dimitry in his thick accent, without looking up from the Pravda website on his iPad, the (fake) century-old Russian propaganda news source that now claimed that a long-term invasion of Ukraine was part of the plan, rather than a sign of the failure of the military to achieve a decisive victory. The others looked puzzled. Chelsea put on her AirPods and watched Oprah’s famous royal interview, while Jonny read The Hollywood Reporter’s story about why Prince Harry and Meghan Markle’s Netflix deal was scrapped.
There are many reasons for having a royal family, although there are strong feelings on both sides. For the most part, Queen Elizabeth is a much-loved part of British life, providing a sense of deep stability as political leaders come and go. “I may be Scottish, she may be English, but I still love the Queen,” Jonny said. “Maybe America would be a little more united if you had one here.” “Or maybe not,” replied Chelsea, now completely absorbed in the fourth series of “The Crown”, dreaming of being a princess.
Jonny poured himself a cup of tea, hummed the national anthem ‘God Save the Queen’ and scoured Amazon for a t-shirt featuring Mr Biden’s predecessor, complete with the banner ‘God Save the King’. Amen.
Marcus J Freed is a Jewish actor, writer and educator. Find it on www.marcusjfreed.com and on social media @marcusjfreed.